Been thinking, I have lots of time for that!

Life really goes in stages doesn't it? The latter end faster than ever.

I am sure you've heard it many times. “I really do NOT feel as old as I look!” That is because we basically are the same person we were in days gone by. We might look smarter on the outside, our accomplishments admirable. Or as Ted puts it: “Some wrinkles made especially for me!” But in every one of us remains that “little boy” or that “little girl”, (depending on our sex of course!)

When I think about my family in Holland, I still think of my youngest brother as my “little brother Willie” even though he is a man of 64 I still have that protective feeling for him. Then my “big sister” at 85, also one of my eight siblings whom I always admired. I remember them in my mind from when we were growing up. Or our first little niece and nephew, Nelly and Govert, I can't think of them as being grandparents already!

You might say:”That could be because you left Holland and family at age 20 to get married in Canada. No I think it is what we keep in our hearts.

When it comes to my own children, who are parents themselves. (Very hard to believe!) I still love them as if they were very young. For instance, I think of Ron, when he was “Ronnie” at 10 years of age, jumping up and down when I came home from the Hospital with his little sister Yvonne. He was never one to express himself, but he sure did that day!

Then Paul, he was then “Paulie” at three years running behind our car crying and screaming: “Mommie, Mommie don't go”, on my way to the Airport for a visit to Holland, it broke my heart then and again even now when I think about it.

Our Yvonne, then “Peach” at about three years old, riding on her trike, her little skirt blowing in the wind (yes that is right, no jeans or pants for my little girl) and her blond curly hair always done up in different ways. How she made my life complete after two boys. My sewing machine was always on the go.

I never wanted much more in my life than my husband and children and now grandchildren.So why is it we as parents never stop caring and being concerned for them? And why do I still care and why am I secretly still ready with advise? Because I am a mother and because in my HEART they have NOT grown up. They are still Ronnie jumping, Paulie running/crying and Peach riding her trike.

When my laptop stands idle for 10min, it goes through my entire picture file at random. That means going back years and years picture after picture. Often me just staring at them. Where has that time gone with all the changes? Then there is me, on the inside, still the same, easily hurt, wanting to please, therefore, avoiding confrontations. I am so glad that my husband sees that. Not in a superior way, believe me, that would not go over too well! But in “an all knowing me” way!

That brings me to an other point, because in a mothers heart the child remains a child, she finds it impossible to believe they are capable to commit a crime. If they do get in trouble, she'll be the first to forgive and forget. Why? Because of her unconditional love for her “young”child. As an example you may have seen Tiger Woods' confession, most of us have an opinion one way or an other, I certainly do, but not his mother, she embraced him. Nobody needs to tell me what she whispered in his ears after breaking her heart!

“Son I love you!” probably seeing him as a youngster playing the greens with an innocent grin on his face!